Fighting For Memories
by Bluebird0032
Summary: Mark doesn't return after going for a ride, and Lucas finds out someone attempted to kill his son.
"How was school today, son?" Lucas asked as he took Blue Boy's reigns and tied them to the post outside their home.
"Fine." Mark flatly said as he slipped off Blue Boy.  
"Are you sure? You don't sound like it was fine." Lucas said.  
"Pa, I told you it was fine." Mark said as he started to lead Blue Boy to the barn.  
Lucas followed his son. Mark obviously wasn't all right, even if his day at school was. He wasn't sure how to handle the situation yet, so he asked his son a question.  
"Learn anything interesting in school?"  
"No. Just a bunch of stuff people are just going to forget anyhow." Mark said, starting to un-saddle Blue Boy. Confused, Lucas began searching for what was the matter.  
"What do you mean? Mark, what's wrong?"  
"Nothing! Nothing's wrong! I'm just tired of going to school and learning stuff that's going to get forgotten. In a hundred years no one is going to remember the dates, places, or even... or even people!" Mark yelled as he ran out of the barn.  
' _what in the world_?' Lucas asked himself. Mark was never one who liked school, but it wasn't school that was the problem... it was something else. Lucas walked out of the barn and followed his son to a wooded area on the property. Lucas let Mark get quite a ways ahead of him and continued to walk slowly as Mark sat down in front of a tree. Lucas finally caught up with his boy and knelt down next to him. Lucas finally had an idea of what could be wrong.  
"What happened today, Mark?" He gently asked his boy.  
"Ms. Adams is having us write reports on our parents, and the importance of each..." Mark said wiping a treat from his cheek.  
"Mark, I know how hard it is living without your mother, but you still know how important she was to me and you. You, out of all the kids, should understand the importance of her role, because the Good Lord, for reasons I can't explain, has allowed you to go without a mother for four years." Lucas slowly and quietly said. He missed his late wife very much, and knew a lot of what Mark was feeling, having lost his own mother at a young age.  
"Pa, that's just it though, it's been four years. Pa... Pa, I'm starting to forget." Mark said as he turned and looked at his Pa's eyes. Lucas looked deep into Mark's eyes and saw several things. Mark was pleading with his Pa to understand, he was scared of losing the memories.  
"Mark," Lucas began as he sat down next to his son and put his arm around him. "Believe me, I know the feeling. I was around five when my mother died and started having trouble remembering her at your age. I was afraid my father wouldn't understand, so I didn't talk to him about it for several years, and when I did, it helped. But something that helped before then was talking to family members about my mother. Hearing old stories, learning about and doing her hobbies made me feel more connected. But I think what helped the most, Mark, was taking times alone just to think about her. You're ma was a beautiful woman with the prettiest smile. She loved to do shopping and sewing like most women, but also had a wild side about her... that somehow got me to teach her to ride. And what a rider she was! But there was something she liked even more. She loved sitting next to me in our living room, holding you and singing you to sleep." Lucas said, looking down lovingly at his precious son. He wished he could do more to help, but he couldn't force memory.  
Mark thought about what his Pa had said. Even though his Pa hadn't said much, it was what he was needing.  
"Pa, do you think I could go for a ride?" Mark asked looking up at his Pa.  
"I don't see why not. Come to the barn with me and I'll help you saddle Blue Boy." Lucas answered. Mark stood up and wrapped his arm around his Pa's waist, and Lucas draped his arm over Mark's shoulders. After saddling and mounting Blue Boy, Mark turned to his father.  
"Thanks Pa." Mark said with a smile on his face.  
"I love you Mark, stay on our property and be back before long, Micah is coming for supper." Lucas replied as he slapped Blue Boy's rear end.  
"I will!" Mark said as he rode off.  
Lucas' eyes followed Mark as he rode off into the distance.  
' _You'd be proud of him, Margret_.' Lucas thought as he went to start chopping wood.

Lucas impatiently paced back and forth in the front room.  
"If he's not back in ten minutes, I'm going out there to look for him." Lucas told Micah, who had been watching his friend pace for the past half hour, and anxiously watch the door for another twenty before that.  
"Calm down Lucas-boy. You're going to wear a hole in the floor. Mark'll be back soon enough, he probably just lost track of time." Micah calmly reassured his friend.  
"Micah, he was supposed to stay on our property and he _knows_ to be back before dark. Even if he did 'loose track of time' it's been dark long enough for him to get back here. Micah, I don't even know what I'm doing staying in. I'm going after him." Lucas said as he placed his hat on top of his head.  
"Right behind you." Micah said. Lucas quickly wrote Mark a note incase he came back to the ranch before they did and left with his rifle in hand.

"MARK! MARK!" Lucas called for the hundredth time. ' _where are you son_?' Lucas inwardly asked. "MARK!" He called again. "Micah, if we don't find him soon I'm going to start looking for him off the ranch." Micah knew how worried Lucas was getting about Mark, the bond between the two of them was indescribable. He wanted to find some words to comfort Lucas, but he was having trouble believing Mark was alright himself.  
"We'll find him, Lucas, we'll find him." Was all he could say.  
' _We'll find him... but how will he be when we find him_?' Lucas asked himself.  
"MARK!" Lucas called again. After another hour of searching places they'd already been on the ranch, Lucas told Micah he was going back to the house to see if Mark had come back yet.  
"I'll ride back to town and look for him. If he's not at the house meet me at my office and we'll start searching the country side." Micah said as Lucas started riding towards his home. Lucas waved in response to what his friend had said.  
' _Please let the boy be there._ ' Micah prayed.

Lucas spent part of his ride home asking the same thing. Mark was Lucas' son... his only son, but their relationship went far beyond what most father-son relationships did. There was a deep, intimate connection between the two of them that everyone could see - but no one could explain. Some would say their relationship was the way it was because that no matter what the situation was, one always put the other first, but that wasn't the cause for their bond, only the evidence of it.  
"Mark?" Lucas called as he entered the yard. Riding past the barn he didn't see Blue Boy... but of course, that didn't mean he wasn't there... he hoped. Lucas entered the house praying he would find his son inside. He looked at the table and the note was still there. Hanging on to the little bit of hope he had left, Lucas entered the bed room, but his son wasn't there either. Letting out a sigh of defeat, Lucas shut the bedroom door and went outside. He stood on the porch and scanned the land, hoping to see Mark riding towards the house.  
' _Just please keep him safe_.' Lucas prayed as he mounted Razor and started his dreaded ride into town.  
As Razor trotted along the dark path, Lucas kept his eyes peeled for any sign of Mark. He checked every side trail he saw and looked at each short cut he knew Mark could take - nothing. Lucas came to the last fork in the road before he would be in town. He started to turn right like normal when something stopped him. He didn't know what it was, but something told him to turn left. He thought he was crazy, but listened to the small voice inside of him, urging him to take the road to the left. Lucas had only gone about ten yards when he saw Mark's hat lying on the side of the road. He kicked Blue Boy and hurried forward.  
"MARK!" Lucas called. He got down and examined the hat. There was no doubt it was his son's.  
"MARK!" He called again. Lucas thought he heard a quiet moan, but wasn't sure. He called his son's name again as he started walking around. There was no doubt, someone was moaning. Lucas suddenly turned his head back to the left to look at a section of tall grass.  
His mind wasn't playing tricks on him - there was a boot sticking out of the grass patch.  
Lucas turned his entire body around and approached the area.  
"Mark!" Lucas said as he knelt down next to his unconscious boy. He tried to wake Mark up, but to no avail. After checking his son to make sure there where no broken bones and trying to look past the blood on his son's face, Lucas picked up his son and gently, lovingly, carried his boy back to Razor. As carefully as Lucas could he put Mark on top of the horse, and tried to balance him as he tried to mount Razor himself. Lucas had one arm wrapped around Mark who laid back against his Pa, still moaning in his unconscious state.  
"Hang on Mark, we'll be at doc's in a few minutes." Lucas whispered into his son's ear.  
"Everything's going to be fine." Lucas continued. ' _he's going to be just fine._ ' Lucas thought, trying to convince himself of what he had just said.

Lucas quickly rode up to the doctor's office, trying to keep from jostling Mark. He used one arm to keep Mark from falling out of the saddle while he dismounted and called for the doc to open the door. Lucas slipped Mark out of the saddle and carried him into the doctor's office. Micah had seen Lucas ride into town with Mark and came running into the office.  
"Is Mark alright?" Micah asked as he looked down at the small boy lying on the examination table. Lucas looked at the doctor who wasn't showing a good expression on his face.  
"Doc?" Lucas asked with growing concern.  
"Lucas I need to do a full examination, which might take some time from the looks of him. Why don't you step outside with Micah?" The doctor asked. He hated to separate the father from his son, but he saw things he didn't want Lucas catching on to quite yet. If the situation hadn't been so serious, Lucas would've laughed at the doctor's suggestion.  
"If you thin..." Lucas began to argue, but Micah interrupted.  
"You're no good in here, you'd just be in Doc's way. Come to the hotel with me and get some coffee."  
"But Micah..."  
"Come on Lucas-boy." Micah said as he put his hand on Lucas' shoulder. Lucas didn't want to leave Mark, but he knew he would be in the way, and Micah wasn't exactly giving him an option. Lucas reluctantly walked out of the office.

"Where did you find him?" Micah asked as they walked onto the street.  
"You know the fork in the road right before town?" Lucas asked. Micah nodded in response. "Well for some reason I took the road to the left and found Mark's hat. I heard someone moaning and walked around, then found him lying in a section of tall grass. There are some things that don't quite add up here, Micah." Lucas said as they sat down at a table.  
Micah gave Lucas a confused look.  
"At first I figured he had been thrown, but Blue Boy would never have thrown Mark, and by the chance that he did - where was he? He wasn't any where near where I found Mark, and he wasn't at the ranch. Like I told you before, Mark was supposed to stay on our property, and even if he didn't he had no reason to be on that road... we never use it." Lucas said.  
"What are you suggesting happened, then?" Micah asked the tall rancher.  
"I don't know. All I'm saying is that _something_ doesn't seem right." Lucas replied.  
"Well as soon as Mark wakes up, we'll know what happened." Micah told his friend reassuringly. Lucas thought on Micah's words.  
' _As soon... or if he wakes up_?' Lucas asked himself. There had not been much light while they where riding and doc's office had been fairly dim, but Lucas could see that Mark's head looked pretty banged up. He hated to think about the possibility that his son could die, but he couldn't avoid questioning Mark's ability to pull through.  
Lucas sat waiting for doc Burrage to come get him. It upset him that he had to wait to be with his son, but deep down, he knew it was for the best. Finally after about fifteen minutes the doctor came into the hotel cafe telling Lucas he could come back to the office. Lucas didn't waste anytime in walking back down the street. Before entering the back room, doc Burrags stopped and turned to Lucas.  
"Now Lucas, it looks like he's going to pull through, but I have to tell you I'm not sure weather he is going to _for sure_ or not. He took serious damage to the head..." Lucas nodded and went for the door, but doc stopped him.  
"Lucas, before you go in, would you mind telling me how he got his head injuries?"  
"I'm not sure. Micah and I have been searching for him for hours, and I found him off the road on my way into town." Lucas looked at the doctor. The look Doc Burrage held on his face worried... not worried, scared Lucas.  
"What... what is it?" The concerned father asked.  
"Lucas I don't know how to say this. It looks like someone tried to bash in Mark's head. I'm pretty sure he has a fractured skull. You're boy shouldn't be alive right now, Lucas. It makes absolutely no sense... medically speaking..." the doctor said, referring to the Lucas' faith. Burrage didn't hold the same religious beliefs, but _Someone_ had intervened with this situation.  
Lucas stepped back in disbelief.  
' _Did he just say what I think he said_?' Lucas asked himself. ' _Did he just say someone tried to kill Mark? Someone... Someone tried to kill my son_?' Fear for his son's life and rage towards whoever had tried to take it overwhelmed Lucas. He took a minute to try to process everything. After a short while he finally went towards the door and opened it. As he saw his son lying on the bed all his anger seemed to be swept away... for the moment, and replaced with overwhelming love. He went to his son and gently laid his hand on Mark's head.  
Feeling the need to give the two some privacy, Doc Burrage shut the door and he and Micah talked in the front room.  
Taking the chair next to the bed, Lucas clasped Mark's hand and brought it to his own face.  
"Oh Mark, I love you. I love you so much. Thank God you're all right." Lucas knew he wasn't going to get any response, but continued to talk anyway.  
"Why where you off the ranch? What happened son? Mark please don't die. Please don't take him, God." Lucas begged, now in tears over the only person that could ever make him cry again. Losing his wife had been devastating to Lucas, Mark was the only reason he had survived his grief. If he lost Mark, his life would be over. Lucas was almost angered by the fact that his boy lie there, struggling for life and he could do nothing. All he could do was sit there and wait.  
Doc Burrage came into the room several times throughout the night but never found Lucas asleep. Lucas noticed that Mark hadn't moved or made any sound since he had gotten back from the hotel and was getting concerned. He didn't know if it was a bad sign, but knew it wasn't a good one.

As the town began to come to life the next morning, news of Mark began to spread. A few friends came into the office to see how Mark was. The doctor simply informed them they wouldn't know until the boy woke up, and politely asked them to leave the office.  
And so time drug on for a week. Lack of sleep and worry was beginning to take a toll on Lucas. Mark didn't show any sign of change and all that was keeping Lucas going was the steady rise and fall of Mark's small frame. One evening Micah had to practically drag Lucas out of the office to get him some fresh air and sleep in a real bed. As they entered the hotel, Lucas began to argue with Micah again.  
"I need to be in the office Micah, with Mark."  
"Doc will get you if there's any change. Now come upstairs before I knock you out and drag you up there." Micah said.  
"What if something happens?" Lucas asked. Micah turned towards his friend.  
"Lucas, if something happens, Doc, who has been to medical school, will be there to take care of it. Then he will come to get you, who won't have been in the way. You need to be able to help Mark after he's awake, so you go in there and get some sleep." Micah said in an authoritative voice as he pointed to room number seven. Lucas consented and walked into the hotel room. He toss and turned for a good hour before he finally fell into a solid, deep sleep. When Lucas woke up it was almost dawn. He crept out of the hotel and entered the office to find Doc Burrage writing at his desk.  
"Morning Lucas." The doctor said, glad to see Lucas seemed somewhat rested.  
"Any change?" Lucas asked glancing at the door to the second room.  
"Not yet. Don't worry, he's made it this far, I'm almost positive he'll pull through."  
"Doc why don't you go over to the hotel and get some coffee." Lucas suggested, he could tell the man needed a break. Doc Burrage nodded and left the office as Lucas entered the second room. He rustled Mark's hair as he sat down.  
"I miss you, Mark." Lucas said. "I miss our long talks out on the porch. Our debates on the importance of school. You know, you're favorite circuit preacher was in town this weekend, he brought his wife and little boy with him, around your age..."  
Lucas continued to tell his still son about what was going on in town, who had stopped in to visit and such. Lucas heard Doc Burrage enter the front office and sighed as he looked at his son. He wasn't really expecting there to be a response, but something inside of him had hoped there would be. Lucas stood up to get some water out of the basin... and thought he heard Mark's voice. He turned around and looked at his son, but Mark was still lying motionless, eyes closed. He turned back, but then he was sure he heard it.  
"Pa? P... Pa?" Mark called with growing desperation in his voice. "PA?" Mark almost screamed. Lucas rushed to his son's side, and upon hearing Mark's call, Doc Burrage entered the room.  
"I'm here Mark, I'm here." Lucas told his son.  
"Pa... I... Pa, Pa..." Mark began to frantically repeat.  
"Mark, it's ok, calm down. What is it?" Lucas asked, seeing total fear on his son's face.  
Mark looked straight into his pa's eyes. All Lucas could see was complete terror.  
"Pa... I can't... I can't move... Pa... I CAN'T MOVE!" Mark screamed, terrified.  
Lucas understood what his son was saying, but didn't have time to take it in, he needed to be there for his son and calm him down.  
"It's alright Mark, just calm down. It's going to be fine." Lucas said as calmly as he could.  
"Pa! Pa I can't move! Why can't I move?!" Mark desperately asked. Mark was completely overwhelmed by fear, his face was covered with tears, and he was starting to hyperventilate.  
"Mark you need to calm down. Take slow, deep breaths." Doc Burrage told Mark.  
Lucas knelt down and put a gentle hand on his son's head, he couldn't stand seeing Mark in such turmoil. He looked completely terrified.  
"Mark, you're going to be fine. Breath slowly, in and out." Lucas whispered to his boy. "That's it, Mark. Nice and slow just relax. You're ok. You're with me, safe."  
Doc Burrage couldn't hear what Lucas was saying, but it was working. Mark's breathing became slower and more controlled, and within two minutes was back to normal. Mark was still crying though, and had no idea what was going on.  
"Mark, are you alright?" Lucas asked his son. He knew Mark's physical condition wasn't very good at the time, but he was asking about his emotional condition. Mark knew what his Pa meant and started to answer.  
"I.. I think so. P... Pa?" Mark asked as he closed his eyes  
"Yes, Mark?" Lucas replied to his son.  
"Where am I?" Mark asked as a million more questions came to his head.  
"Doc Burrage's office." Lucas informed his son. Mark wanted to ask so many questions, but he couldn't think straight, he didn't understand what was happening.  
"Mark can you feel this?" Doc Burrage said as he tapped Mark's foot.  
"Feel what?" Mark said, trying to lift his head.  
"Never Mind. Mark, what can you move?" The doctor asked the boy.  
"My head is all. Doc..." Mark tried to ask another question, but his brain was too fogged to think. Lucas watched his son try to make sense of everything. As much as he knew Doc needed to figure out what was wrong, he and Mark needed to talk. Doc asked a few more questions then left the room, knowing what they both wanted... and needed.  
"Oh Mark, I love you. You had me scared half to death!" Lucas said as he gave his son an awkward hug. When Lucas let Mark go, his son stared at the ceiling for a minute before talking.  
"Pa, what happened? Why can't I move?" Mark asked his father, desperate for answers.  
"Mark, I was hoping you could tell me that. Over a week ago you left for a ride and when you didn't come back Micah and I went looking for you. I found you off the side of the road that goes to Silver City. What's the last thing you remember?" Lucas inquired.  
"Well," Mark said, trying to think. "I remember walking out of church... I think it was the good preacher that had spoken. Ms. Adams gave us a history test that Tuesday, I think. Umm... everything else is kinda all jumbled together in a blur... how long ago was that?" Mark asked.  
"The 'good' preacher was here two days ago for services, which means you're remembering about six weeks ago, Mark." Lucas replied. Mark's face became crestfallen. "Don't worry, your memory will come back with time." Lucas assured his son. He knew the fact that Mark couldn't remember that much wasn't good... but he was glad deep down he didn't remember someone trying to kill him.  
"Pa, will... will I be able to move again?" Mark asked.  
"Mark, I wish I had the answer, but I don't know. But weather you will be able to or not, everything is going to be just fine." Lucas said as he looked into his worried son's face.  
"Just fine, Mark. I promise you we'll make it through this together." Lucas took Mark's hand and held it firmly in his own.  
Mark soon fell asleep and Lucas quietly stepped out of the room.  
"Why can't he move?" Lucas asked trying to make sense of everything.  
"When someone hit his head it damaged his nerves... I was afraid it would happen but wasn't able to tell until he woke up." The doctor solemnly replied.  
"Will it heal?"  
"I don't know Lucas. We simply must wait for time to tell. There have been several cases where severely damaged nerves have healed and the person was able to do everything just as they could before their accident... but there are others where the patient remains paralyzed... and we have to prepare Mark for that, Lucas."  
"Excuse me, Doc." Lucas said as he walked out of the office. He needed some time to sort through everything. Lucas didn't want to go far from town so he didn't bother getting Razor from the livery, he just walked the almost deserted roads around the edge of town.  
He was so glad Mark had woken up, and that he could talk with his son again, but to find that his son was paralyzed... and could be for the rest of his life was almost too much.  
Micah had been coming back from visiting some of the outlining ranches when he saw Lucas sitting alone on a fallen log, quite a ways from the road. He rode closer to Lucas and dismounted. The look on the rancher's face worried Micah.  
"Is Mark all right?" He asked. Lucas had been so deep in thought, he hadn't even noticed Micah ride up. He jerked around and relaxed when he recognized the short man behind him.  
"Yes and no..." Lucas replied.  
"What do you mean?" Micah asked, fearing the boy had been taken above.  
"He woke up early this morning after I came back from the hotel. I had my back turned to him when he started calling for me... Micah I looked into his eyes... He was so scared, lost, and confused..."  
"Did he tell you what happened?"  
"Last he remembers was six weeks ago."  
"At least it's not worse, I've known several people who have head injuries way less serious than Mark and can't remember anything." Micah said, miserably failing to be positive.  
"It _is_ worse Micah. Mark... he can't move." Lucas said as he began to fully understand what this all meant.  
"What?" Micah asked... hoping he had heard Lucas wrong.  
"Paralyzed from the shoulders down and Doc doesn't know if he'll be able to move again."  
"Lucas..." Micah began to say before he was interrupted.  
"You know, after he had woken up and calmed down from the initial shock of not being able to move, I hugged him. But he couldn't hug me back. His arms just laid limply by his side. Micah I don't know how to deal with this. I pray with all my heart that he'll be able to move again... but what if he can't? What kind of life will he have?"  
"Whatever kind of a life you give him." Micah replied. "Lucas, you treat him like a baby who can't do anything, and that's what he'll be. You treat him like the capable young man he's becoming, and he will be able to do anything, capable of moving or not. You two can make it through just about anything together."

A few days later, Lucas entered the office after picking up lunch at the hotel. Doc Burrage was in the back doing some exercises with Mark, who suddenly winced.  
"What is it , Mark?" Doc Burrage asked.  
"My arm feels like someone's stabbing a knife through it." He replied, letting out a breath as the pain began to subside.  
"That's a good sign! It means your nerves are starting to heal." Doc Burrage happily explained. Lucas looked from Doc Burrage to Mark who was trying to put a smile on his face.  
"We're done for now Mark." The doctor said as he exited the room. Lucas and Mark talked as they ate lunch. Lucas could tell Mark was embarrassed that he had to spoon feed him, but Lucas enjoyed it. It brought back memories of when Mark was younger, and made Lucas feel closer to his son.  
"You rest now, I'm going to talk with Doc." Lucas said.  
"Oh, but Pa that's all I ever do. I'm tired of sleeping." Mark argued.  
"Mark you need it."  
"Pa..." Mark began to say, but Lucas' face told him he'd better obey, so he yielded and closed his eyes.

"When do you think I can take him home?" Lucas asked the doctor.  
"Lucas, I'd really rather he stay here for a bit longer so I can get a better idea of how much healing we can expect..."  
"What you'd really like to see is him stay here until he's up and around, but we don't know when... or even if... that's going to happen. Doc you've done a lot, and I appreciate it, but I can do everything that we're doing here with him at home."  
"Lucas, I hate to admit it but you're right. I think going home might even help him find some of the memory he's lost. Stay in town one more night and you can take him to the ranch tomorrow morning. But I do want to see you back here Friday."  
"All right." Lucas said. He appreciated everything the doctor had done, but it was time to take his boy home.

The next morning Lucas woke up and saw Mark was already awake. Doc, Micah, and Mark had all tried to persuade Lucas to stay in the hotel but he refused, and just used the army cot.  
"Good morning Mark." Lucas said to his son. Mark just nodded with a grim look on his face.  
"Looks like you could use some good news." Mark looked over at his Pa, confused.  
"How would you like to go home?" Lucas asked his son.  
"Really Pa?" Mark asked excitedly.  
"Of course if you'd rather stay in this stuffy old office..." Lucas began to tease.  
" _Please_ take me home Pa!" Mark begged.

After Doc Burrage did a final examination on Mark, Lucas carried his son out to the buck board he had brought into town the night before. He started to put Mark in the back when Mark asked, "Can I sit up with you?". Lucas wasn't exactly sure how it was going to work, because Mark couldn't actually sit up by himself, but he decided to try letting Mark lean up against him in the front. While driving home Lucas listened to Mark talk about how he remembered the day _after_ the history test - Tommy had managed an 'A' and got so excited he accidentally knocked the ink well off his desk. Lucas smiled as he enjoyed his time completely alone with his son.

About a week later Mark was sitting on his father's lap after dinner listening to Lucas read from their family Bible. Once Lucas realized Mark was asleep, he gently placed the Bible on the table and carried his son to their bedroom. Lucas laid Mark down and pulled his son's boots off. He smiled proudly as he looked down at his son. Mark had definitely acted very mature over the past few weeks. He hadn't moped around, feeling sorry for himself, he had told Lucas when he was hurting, but didn't whine about it like Lucas had half expected him to. Doc Burrage kept saying the pain was a good sign, but Lucas hated to see Mark in so much pain. He tucked his son under the covers and put his hand in Mark's.  
"I love you." Lucas said to his sleeping son. As he started to pull his hand away he felt the slightest squeeze from Mark, and almost thought he was imagining things, but the pressure did not go away. He smiled and brushed Mark's bangs out of his face before leaving the room.

Several miles outside of North Fork, two men sat around a campfire and reached for their guns as they heard a rider approach.  
"James, I thought I told you to make sure it looked like an accident!" The heavy man yelled as he dismounted. The two men put down their guns.  
"I did!" James retorted. He wasn't one who took accusations of any kind very well.  
"Word is around town that someone tried to kill the brat!"  
"What's the difference as long as the kid's dead..." the third man injected.  
"The difference is, Thomas, the kid isn't dead and the his father just happens to be _the_ Rifleman." The other two men rose at the mention of the man they had heard of as far as the Mississippi.  
"The kid spilled? And his pa's..." James asked.  
"No. The kid lost quite a bit of memory but they say it's coming back."  
"Will, what are we going to do?" Thomas questioned.  
"Make sure the kid isn't alive long enough to remember." Will calmly replied.  
"But his father..."  
"His father nothing. Here's what we're going to do."

"I can still get the buck board... are you sure you don't want to come into town?" Lucas asked Mark, who was sitting in a chair on the front porch.  
"I'm sure Pa."  
"Mark, you used to love coming into to town, why don't you want to any more? You don't come unless Doc says he wants to see you." Lucas said as he walked over to Mark.  
"It's not town I don't like, Pa. It's... It's the people."  
"Mark, you..." Lucas began to say before Mark interrupted.  
"Pa, I don't know how to explain this but it's just really awkward. Everyone always stares at me and I can't get anywhere by myself and it's... embarrassing." Mark said as he hoped his Pa would understand. Lucas studied his son for a moment. He had seen the stares and understood that people just weren't used to seeing a child unable to move, but it was another reminder to Mark that he couldn't do anything for himself.  
"All right Mark. I'll see you in a few hours." Lucas said as he pulled Mark's hat over his eyes.  
"Pa, a little help here?" Mark asked as Lucas began to walk away. Lucas suddenly realized what he had done and went back to lift Mark's hat. Lucas felt horrible and Mark knew he did.  
"It's alright Pa. See you later." Mark said with a big smile on his face.  
"Love you Mark." Lucas said as he mounted Razor and rode off.

"Howdy Lucas-boy. Say, where's Mark?" Micah asked as he walked up to Lucas.  
"He wanted to stay at the ranch."  
"How's the boy doing?"  
"Hanging in there. I think he's started get a tiny amount of control in his hand, but I only noticed it once... while he was sleeping, so I'm not sure what it means. I'll tell you though, since he can't get his energy out by running around he's found another way - talkin'. I knew Mark liked to talk but this is something else!" Lucas said as he shook his head.  
"How's he doing with not being able to... well..."  
"Not being able to do anything for himself? I think it's really starting to get to him. It's part of why he wanted to stay home today, because he 'can't get anywhere by himself and it's embarrassing'." Lucas replied.  
"Mark's always been such an energetic boy... it's not right for him to be laid up like he is."  
"Well if things keep going the way they seem to be, Doc doesn't think he should stay like this long. I've got to finish up some of my errands... I'll be seeing you, Micah."  
"See you Lucas-boy. I'll drop by later to say hi to Mark." Micah said as he patted Lucas.  
"You're welcome to ride back with the ranch with me and stay for supper." Lucas invited.  
"I think I'll do that. Stop by the office when you're done."

Once Lucas was done with his errands he dropped by the Marshall's office and he and Micah rode back to the ranch. Lucas was relieved to be able to talk with some one in detail about the difficulties of handling Mark. They where a short distance from the house when Lucas suddenly stopped in the middle of his sentence.  
"What is it Lucas?" Micah asked. When the man didn't reply Micah followed Lucas' eyes and saw what Lucas was staring intensely at - a small figure doubled over on the porch.  
"Mark!" Lucas called as he kicked Razor, Micah quickly followed. As they approached the house, Lucas could hear frantic screams coming from his son.  
"Mark! Mark what's wrong?" Lucas asked as he jumped off Razor. Mark just continued to scream as his father came over to him and knelt down, gently placing his hands on Mark.  
"Mark, what's wrong?" Lucas asked again, needing to find out how to help his son.  
"PA MAKE IT STOP! PA, IT HURTS!" Mark managed to yell between his screams.  
"Mark, what hurts?!" Lucas asked his son who was burning up.  
" **EVERYTHING**! PA MAKE IT STOP!" Mark cried.  
"I'll get Doc." Micah said as he turned his horse around and left the ranch.  
"It's alright, Mark. You're going to be fine." Lucas told his son as he picked Mark up and carried him to the bedroom. Mark just continued to scream in pain. After laying Mark down, Lucas went to hold his son's hand, but as he made contact Mark yelled out in more pain. Lucas quickly drew back his hand and stood to get some rags and cold water.  
" **NO PA,** ** _PLEASE_** **DON'T GO!** " Mark begged through his tears. Lucas knelt back down and for the next hour and a half stared helplessly at his screaming child. There was nothing he could do. Neither of them understood what was happening, Mark was too scared to let Lucas step out to get something to cool him, and Lucas couldn't even give his son the comfort of a loving touch.  
Doc Burrage finally arrived and after gathering information from Lucas and seeing what pain Mark was in, gave the boy a sedative. It took a few minutes, but Mark eventually drifted to sleep. The Doctor applied wet compresses and then the men walked into the front room.  
"Doc... what... what just happened?" Lucas asked. He felt like he was in a nightmare... the sound of Mark screaming echoed in his head, refusing to leave him alone.  
"Lucas I'm not sure. I won't know for sure until I can talk with Mark, but I think his nerves are taking a big step forward in the healing process. The fever is from inflammation, no doubt."  
"Will he still be in pain when he wakes up?" Micah asked, concerned for the boy.  
"Yes he will, and quite a bit. I've given him something to help, but I can't give him too much or it may interfere with the healing process."

A few hours later Mark called for his Pa from the bedroom. All three men came into the room and Doc Burrage started asking Mark questions. Lucas could see that his son was still in a lot of pain, but was thankful it wasn't as intense as before. Doc Burrage left Lucas with instructions on what Mark was to eat and how often to change the compresses, and Micah headed back to town shortly after the doctor. After seeing Micah to the door, Lucas came back into the bedroom and sat on Mark's bed.  
"How do you feel, Mark?"  
"I hurt... everywhere... but it ain't near as bad as it was earlier." Mark said.  
"How soon did you start hurting after I left?" Lucas asked. He didn't really want to know how long he hadn't been there for his son, but he needed to.  
"An hour or so." Mark said as he winced at another sharp pain running through his body.  
Lucas closed his eyes as he imagined his son lying on the porch for over three hours in such pain... then suddenly he realised something.  
"Mark... how did you get out of the chair?"  
"What do you mean?" Mark asked, confused.  
"When I left you where sitting in the chair on the porch, and when I came back you where... _doubled over_ on the porch in front of the chair." Lucas said just as confused. Mark thought through everything that had happened and slowly looked up at his Pa.  
"I... I don't know really. I remember thinking about how I wanted to get up and come get help but... I don't know, Pa. I just know I was suddenly on the porch floor and I couldn't do anything else but..." Mark stopped short. His Pa really didn't need to hear what he was thinking, he already knew what happened. "Uh, just lie there."

Several times throughout the night Mark woke up in horrible pain. Each serious episode lasted about fifteen minutes, but it took Mark a good thirty minutes to fall back to sleep. Lucas got up from his bunk and knelt next to Mark each time he woke. He would simply talk to Mark to try to calm his son. Lucas wished there was something he could do to relieve Mark of the pain he felt but all either of them could do was wait. Lucas wanted so badly to reach out and touch Mark, but the compresses where adding enough extra pain as it was.

The days drug on without much improvement and Lucas was becoming more and more discouraged. Mark didn't think about the fact that he wasn't getting better, all he could think about was the constant pain. One night, Lucas was in the kitchen making some coffee when he heard Mark starting to call out. He thought Mark was having another episode until he got into the bedroom and saw Mark thrashing his arms around in his sleep.  
"Please... please no... leave her alone... stay away! Help! HELP!" Lucas began to try to wake his son.  
"Mark, wake up. Come on son, it's ok, wake up." Lucas calmly said.  
"Leave her alone! Stop... stop..." Mark's voice trailed off and he soon went back to a peaceful sleep. Lucas didn't try to wake his son any longer and headed back to the kitchen. He thought about Mark's nightmare and for the first time in several weeks remembered that someone had done this to Mark. Micah and a few men had searched the area he had found Mark but couldn't find anything. No one had seen Blue Boy yet, either. Lucas had almost completely forgotten that someone had tried to kill Mark because his son couldn't even remember the day he left for the ride. Lucas' thoughts where suddenly interrupted by a sudden realization.  
' _Did he just... it's not possible... how could he-?_ ' Lucas thought, and then his confused frown turned into a smile. ' _Mark just moved... by himself_.'

Early the next morning Lucas stepped out of the ranch house to chop fire wood. He stopped as he watched a rider approach and grabbed his rifle which was leaning against the chopping block.  
"Morning." The man said as he rode up to Lucas.  
"Mornin'. Anything I can do for you? A little early to be out riding isn't it?" Lucas asked.  
"Not when you have an important message to deliver. You Lucas McCain?" The man asked.  
"Yes." Lucas said tightening his trip on his rifle.  
"When you wake up, follow the trail we leave and don't bring anybody with you if you want him back alive." The man said as a evil grin crossed his face.  
"When I-" Lucas started to ask, confused and enraged. But before he could get anything else out, something hit his head and darkness took over.

As Lucas began to regain consciousness, he tried sitting up and eventually got on his feet. He tried remembering what happened as he leaned against the well... and then he remembered the man's words. ' _If you want him back alive_...'  
"MARK!" Lucas yelled as he ran into the house, rubbing the back of his head. Lucas ran into the bedroom, praying his son would be there. He stopped two feet from Mark's bed, devastated that all he saw was twisted sheets. A million thoughts rushed through his head of where his son could be or what condition his son could be in, but Lucas pushed them all aside and focused on one thought:  
' _Just find Mark._ '  
Lucas saddled Razor and took off in the direction that the very obvious tracks headed. He didn't even consider riding to get Micah. The words, ' _And don't bring anybody with you if you want him back alive._ ' Swirled in his head.  
"I'm coming, Mark." Lucas whispered.

Lucas rode hard and fast. All he could think about was getting his son back- alive. It only took a few hours before Lucas found the camp site the tracks led to, but as he looked around he realized something was wrong.  
' _Where's Mark_?' Lucas asked himself as he dismounted Razor. He started to plan a methodical search around the outskirts of the small camp, he only saw two men sitting by the fire, a wagon, and... Lucas' thoughts where interrupted by hearing a gun being cocked behind his head.  
"Nice and easy, drop the rifle and turn around." A man with a gruff voice said. Lucas hesitated... He could probably get the drop on whoever was holding a gun to him, but if he was part of the group that was holding Mark... Lucas carefully set the rifle down.  
"Where's my son?" Lucas bitterly asked as he turned to face the man.  
"You'll find out soon enough. Walk on down to the camp." Lucas took a step towards the man, only to be stopped by the gun being shoved into his chest.  
"You tell me where my son is." Lucas said with authority he didn't have.  
The outlaw simply gestured for Lucas to walk to the camp.  
"Hey Will! This sod buster wants to see his little boy! What do ya say about that?" Thomas called.  
"I'd say, he needs to learn a little lesson in patience." Will said as he approached Lucas and punched him across the face. Lucas had little strength because of riding with his head injury and fell to the ground. He tried to get back up but Thomas turned his gun around and hit Lucas in the back of the head again.

When Lucas woke up he thought he was dreaming because he thought he was hearing screams, but soon realized that he _was_ awake and someone _was_ screaming. Then he realized Mark was the one screaming.  
"MARK!" Lucas yelled as he began to slowly stand up. The pain he felt from being hit in the back of the head twice was increasing, but he had to find his son.  
"MARK!" Lucas called again. The room was pitch black, there where no windows, and he soon found out that the ground and walls where earth. He tried walking around the small room to see what he could find but it seemed to be empty. He found a ladder and climbed it as he continued to call his son's name. At the top of the ladder there was a trap door and Lucas tried to force it open, but to no avail. He tried the trap door one more time, but this time became extremely dizzy, lost his balance, and fell to the ground below. He came in and out of consciousness for a good hour before he was able to stay awake, but was tortured by constantly hearing Mark's yelling. Then suddenly it stopped. He prayed that it was a good thing, but deep down he knew it was not. Lucas tried to fight sleep, but he was exhausted and injured, and darkness consumed him again.

At the mention of some 'sod buster' Mark attempted to drag himself to the edge of the wagon. He had noticed as the men picked him up and carried him away from the house that he had control of his waist up, but still couldn't feel his legs. His fears where confirmed as he was finally able to peak his head out of the fabric covering the opening to the wagon and saw his Pa being knocked out.  
"PA!" Mark yelled. He tried pulling himself out of the wagon... he had to be with his Pa, but couldn't get out before one of the outlaws came up to wagon and tied Mark up.  
"I thought you was supposed to be paralyzed." The man said, annoyed at the kid for having caused so much trouble.  
"What do you want with us?" Mark asked trying to put a brave face on.  
"Considering what you saw us do, we couldn't very well have you running around telling everyone and with your Pa being the Rifleman and all..." The man replied, surprised the kid couldn't put two and two together.  
"Considering I saw you do what? I have no idea what you're talking about! I've been paralyzed for the last few weeks and I've only been home and in town! Let us go!" Mark yelled to the man who had left the wagon.  
"Will, that kid hasn't got the faintest idea what we done. Do we really need to kill him and his Pa? I mean that's cold blooded murder..."  
"You've murdered in cold blood before what's your problem now? You going soft James?"  
"I've just never had someone I thought I killed talk to me afterwards. It's a strange feeling... Knowing I bash-"  
"We'll drop them off, blow the cave, and no one will hear of them again. Father and son go on a little camping trip and get caught in a cave in, that's all. We'll take 'em back to the hide out and then take them out there individually." Will said.

Once they had arrived at a small ranch, Mark was taken to a room and locked inside. He tried to figure out what he had supposedly seen them do, but couldn't figure it out. As he looked out the window and saw the sun begging to set, he suddenly felt intense pain shooting through his body. He wrapped his arms around himself and squeezed as tight as he could. He started to bite his lip and when he couldn't take the pain anymore and started screaming.

"What in the world?!" James asked as he jumped out of his chair. "What's he screaming for?" He asked.  
"I don't know but if he doesn't shut up soon go in there and find out." Will ordered. Eventually James entered the room Mark was in and tried to figure out what was wrong with the brat. He walked back into the kitchen after watching Mark scream for a few minutes.  
"Kid's in pain from something. I heard that people starting to come out of paralysis go through some pretty intense pain and he was moving around earlier... Maybe that's it."  
"I don't care. Kid's going to be dead by this time tomorrow anyway. Get ready to take him out to the cave and start back 'bout dawn." Will stated as he lit his pipe.

Lucas woke up and heard the door above him open. Light flooded the cellar and caused Lucas to loose focus for a few moments. He didn't realize a man had made his way into the room until there was a gun in his face and was ordered up the ladder. As Lucas emerged from the trap door he saw another man with his rifle standing above him.  
"McCain, I'm sure glad you and your boy got caught up in this mess. Did you know you have men all over the territory with a price on your head? By killing you and your son..." Lucas had heard enough. He ducked and threw a punch to the outlaw's stomach with his right hand as he took his rifle with his left. He was holding his rifle on the man when the second outlaw came out of the cellar and seeing what has happened, reached for his gun. Lucas shot the man dead center without trying. He never liked taking someone's life but sometimes, your body reacts too quickly for the mind.  
Lucas motioned for the survivor to sit at the table.  
"I'm only going to ask you this one time..." Lucas started, but heard a rider approaching. He stood behind the door, rifle still trained on the outlaw in front of him.  
"Drop your gun." Lucas ordered as a man entered the shack. As the man began to drop the shotgun, Lucas recognized him.  
"Micah! What are you doing here?" Lucas asked, surprised, but glad to see his friend.  
"I came back out to the ranch last night and saw something wasn't right and followed the tracks. What happened?" Micah asked looking over at the man sitting at the table, and then the one lying dead on the floor.  
"I'm not sure. Right now we just need to find Mark." Lucas' mind went back to the screams he had heard the night before. "Like I said before, I'm only going to ask this once. Where's my son?" Lucas asked as he shoved the rifle in Will's face.

After putting Will on a horse and tying him to the saddle horn, the three men took off in the direction Will has told them to. Lucas and Micah where both praying that Will wasn't leading them into an ambush. After about ten minutes, Lucas saw another rider coming towards them.  
"He one of yours?" Micah asked.  
"He took the brat to the cave." Will stated with anger in his voice.  
As James approached the group he soon realized it wasn't Thomas and Will leading McCain as prisoner. Will was McCain's prisoner. He knew it was over and they would hang for sure. He pulled his gun and fired.  
Lucas dropped the reigns to Will's horse and went for his rifle, but Micah had already shot the outlaw.  
Will and James both slumped over in the saddle. With all the outlaws dead, Lucas' only hope for finding Mark was to follow James' track, hopefully to the cave.  
Micah watched Lucas take off on Razor, and followed after tying the horses with dead men across them to a tree.  
Lucas tied Razor and entered the cave calling his son's name, hoping... praying... begging for an answer, but none came. He continued deeper into the cave and lit a torch he found as it got too dark for him to see.

Mark lied on the cave floor, hands bound behind his back. He noticed just how cold it was as the pain finally stopped shooting through his body. Then he suddenly realized, ' _I can feel my legs... I can feel my legs!'_ Mark tried to stand, and failed the first few times but soon was balanced enough to stand in place. After a few minutes, he started to try to walk, and was soon trying to find his way out of the cave.

"MARK!" Lucas called for the thousandth time. He was having a hard time walking, his head felt like someone was hitting it with a hammer, but he had to find Mark. He marked his trail at every turn off so he could find his way back, but soon realized his torch was almost half way spent. He was almost ready to turn around and get supplies he had seen at the entrance to the cave (that he knew he should of grabbed before hand) when he thought he heard something. He stopped walking and listened... just to make sure, he stopped breathing for a moment. He hadn't heard something, he had heard _someone_... and that someone was crying for his Pa.  
"MARK!" Lucas called. Mark heard his name, and as he heard it being called again, he recognized his father's wonderful voice. He stood up, and as best as he could, started running towards Lucas' voice.  
Lucas was rounding a corner when he suddenly tripped over something and took quite a few steps back after catching himself. He got down and examined the boot, Mark's boot, lying on the ground.  
Mark saw light, walked towards it, and soon recognized Lucas' frame squatting ten feet in front of him.  
Lucas heard something pop behind him and turned around just in time for Mark to walk straight into his father to try to give him a hug without his arms. Lucas embraced his son, and didn't think anything of Mark not returning the embrace until he realized Mark had been walking. He looked down and saw his son's arms bound behind his back. Lucas kept his arms wrapped around his son as he untied Mark's hands. Once his hands where free, Mark wrapped his arms around Lucas' neck and held his father tight. He didn't want to ever let go. Neither Lucas or Mark could say anything for a long time. They both cried tears of joy and relief as they embraced the other.  
"Mark... You where walking... By yourself..." Lucas said as he pulled his son off of him and looked at his wonderful face.  
"Doesn't everybody?" Mark laughed as he went to hug his Pa again. He finally had his Pa back.  
Lucas and Mark began to walk toward the opening of the cave after sitting for a few more minutes. Mark looked up to his Pa as he wrapped his arm around his Pa's waist.  
"I love you, Pa." Mark said.  
"I love you too, Mark." Lucas said as he rustled Mark's hair.

Mark and Lucas ran into Micah as they walked through the cave and Micah gave Mark a good slap on the back.  
"You've got to stop scaring people like this Mark." Micah said with a smile. Lucas and Mark ride double back to the ranch and they properly took care of the bodies. Lucas found Blue Boy in one of the barns and brought him out for Mark to ride home. The three made it back to North Fork around supper time and doc was coming out of his office as he saw Mark getting down from Blue Boy without help.  
"Mark , when did this happen?" Doc Burrage asked in surprise.  
"This morning." Mark said. "Pa's hurt on the head..."  
"Mark, I'm just fine." Lucas said.  
"Then let Doc Burrage prove it." Micah said.  
Mark, Micah, and Doc Burrage had to practically drag Lucas into the office.  
Lucas told the doctor some of what had taken place and said he had 'just' gotten knocked out a few times. He wanted Mark checked out right away. Mark told Doc Burrage what he felt was necessary and nothing more... he needed to talk alone with his Pa before he talked with anyone else.  
Micah and Doc tried to convince Lucas to stay in town at least overnight, but he even saw past them trying to use Mark. After eating, Lucas and Mark left for home.

Lucas and Mark rode out to the wooded area they had talked at almost a month prior. Lucas sat down and Mark sat on his father's knee.  
"Pa... I know I shouldn't have been... I know I should be strong, like a man, but especially in the cave, alone, in pain, I... I was scarred something awful." Mark said as he rested his head on his Pa's shoulder and started crying. Lucas sat his son up and wiped the tears from his face.  
"Mark, there's nothing to be ashamed of. Fear isn't a bad thing, It's what you do with that fear that matters. You've been extremely strong throughout this whole thing, stronger than I would expect any man to be. Through all the pain you experienced, all the uncertainty and loneliness, you acted more mature than some full grown men would have. Mark, never be afraid to feel fear, I feel fear all the time."  
"You... You do?" Mark asked.  
"Mark, I fear lots of things, but most of all, I fear losing you. You're my son, my life... And I can't always protect you like I would like to. When things like what happened yesterday morning, or when they tried to kill you..." Lucas suddenly saw a strange look coming from his son.  
"Pa, what do you mean when they tried to kill me?" Mark asked, confused.  
"Remember I told you you went riding and then I found you off the road?" Mark nodded and Lucas realized he had failed to tell his son that someone had tried to kill him.  
"Mark, I'm sorry. By the time you had gotten home and well enough to take the news... I forgot to tell you. Everyone knew it I just assumed you knew it too... " Lucas was at a loss for words. He knew he had almost even forgot that someone has tried to kill Mark, but had he forgotten to tell Mark, or purposely not told him?  
Mark started putting the pieces together in his head.  
"So you say we had a talk and I went riding... I saw the outlaws do something I wasn't supposed too and they... they tried to - kill me?" Mark asked. He couldn't wrap his brain around someone trying to kill him... But was getting even more upset that he couldn't remember, and then he realized something else, too.  
"And because I saw what ever it was... They tried to kill you too..."  
Mark stood up and looked at his Pa. He slowly shook his head.  
"I... I'm sorry Pa, I'm sorry!" Mark said as he turned and ran away.  
"Mark, stop!" Lucas yelled after his son as he stood. Mark was already getting on top of Blue Boy and riding away as Lucas reached the horses.  
"MARK!" Lucas yelled as he mounted Razor and took off after Mark. Lucas stopped when he saw Blue Boy grazing without a rider. Lucas looked around and upon spotting Mark, dismounted and headed towards his confused son.  
"You know, Mark, you've got to get a different hiding spot. I'm getting too old to climb these trees." Mark wouldn't look at Lucas. He felt ashamed and guilty. He wanted to run.  
"I guess I do since you're blocking my only escape."  
"Mark, I don't know what's going on in your head, but we need to straighten a few things out. But first of all, I don't want you to ever feel like you need to escape from me, so if you want to go, go." Lucas said, moving out of the way. Mark didn't budge, he just kept looking at the tree branch.  
"Mark I don't know what happened that day, what you saw, or why it was so bad those men tried to kill you - twice. But the fact is Mark, it was those men not you. Mark, they went after me because of my reputation with this rifle, not because of you. It just so happened that the incidents crossed. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?" Lucas asked, concern in his voice.  
"You're trying to tell me this isn't my fault. But it is. Whatever happened that day was my fault and they almost killed you..."  
"Mark," Lucas said as he took Mark's chin and made his son look him in the eye. "It was not your fault. Those men where doing something wrong and you saw it, end of story. Whatever else happened was their fault. Sometimes bad things in life happen, but the Lord uses those things to change us. Mark I know coming close to dying is scary, and almost losing someone you care about is even worse. But you can't blame yourself. I have to fight myself to not blame me for what happened because I wasn't there and..." Mark interrupted his father.  
"That's just it Pa, you weren't there and you weren't the men who tried to..." Mark suddenly realized what his Pa was trying to say to him. He couldn't blame himself or anyone but the outlaws for what happened.  
"You understand, Mark?" Lucas asked his son. Mark nodded.  
They continued to talk through everything that had happened. Lucas corrected his son's thinking here and there, and Mark even did the same thing to his Pa once or twice. As they climbed down the tree, Lucas spoke up again.  
"You know Mark, I never what you to run from me like that," Mark nodded as Lucas looked down to his son. "But I will tell you it was great seeing you run again."  
"It feels great too." Mark said with a smile. Father and son rode back to the ranch, side by side.

The next few weeks flew by and school had let out for summer vacation. Mark hated school and was elated to have the break. Mark and Lucas spent their time working around the ranch. One evening they where getting ready to go to the summer social when Lucas saw Mark sitting at the table rubbing his head.  
"You feel alright, son?" Lucas asked.  
"Huh? Oh, yeah fine." Mark said as he realized he was giving his headache away and stopped rubbing.  
"Are you sure? we don't have to go to this thing..." Lucas teased. He knew this was the one event Mark looked forward to all year. Mark headed out the door.  
"Let's go, Pa!" Mark called.

Lucas kept an eye on Mark that afternoon. Even though Mark insisted he was fine, Lucas knew his boy wasn't feeling very well. Lucas had decided to enter the shooting contest and noticed that Mark had disappeared after the first few shots. After he was done, he went to find Mark but soon saw him talking with a group of friends and decided he would talk with him later. Micah saw Lucas watching Mark and walked up to him.  
"Sure is nice to see everything back to normal." Micah commented.  
"Indeed it is." Lucas said, turning to his friend. "Mark's really appreciated being able to talk with you Micah. Me, too."  
"You two are like family to me Lucas-boy, any thing you ever need, don't be afraid to ask."  
"Same goes for you." Lucas said with a smile. Micah turned towards Mark and his group of friends.  
"Lucas, is everything all right with Mark?"  
"Why do you ask?" Lucas questioned. Maybe he wasn't imagining things and did need to take his son home.  
"He just doesn't look right."  
"I caught him rubbing his head before we left. He of course said he was fine, but I don't think he's feeling well. I'm glad you said something. You know I've been a little over protective of him the past few weeks and didn't want to spoil his night for no reason."  
"Just a 'little'? Lucas, you've been more than a little over protective of your son. But I can't blame you. And I do agree with you, he looks like he needs to go home." Micah said.  
"Thanks Micah." Lucas walked over to where his son was standing and waited for Tommy to finish telling his joke before speaking up.  
"Mark, it's time to go home, son." Much to Lucas' surprise, Mark didn't try to come up with excuse to stay and started walking away from the group.  
"See you guys later." Mark said as he waved. Lucas and Mark mounted their horses and left town. As they rode, Lucas noticed Mark was looking a little pale.  
"Mark are you feeling all right?" Lucas asked.  
"Pa, why would you..." Mark started to say as he started to slip out of the saddle. Lucas got Razor close enough to Mark to keep him from falling out of the saddle and took Blue Boy's reigns from Mark.  
"That's why." Stopping both horses, Lucas continued. "Mark, I think we need to go back into town and see Doc Burrage."  
"Pa it's not something that bad. I just feel a little dizzy and my head hurts is all. And... and besides, Doc Burrage is out of town, remember?" Mark was glad he wasn't going to have to sit through an examination. Even though this headache was worse than what he'd been experiencing, his headaches had been coming off and on since he had woken up, and Doc Burrage said they would eventually go away.  
"You have me there, but I'm riding double with you."  
"Aw, Pa, I'm ten years old, I don't need-"  
"No arguments." Lucas said as he motioned for Mark to dismount. Lucas made Mark sit in front of him and was glad he had when Mark fell asleep in the saddle. Mark didn't even wake up as Lucas put him to bed.  
Lucas didn't get much sleep that night, he kept hearing Mark thrash around in his bed, calling out and screaming, but never waking. The next morning Lucas was in the kitchen making breakfast when Mark emerged from the bed room.  
"Morning Pa." He said. Suddenly realizing last thing he remembered was getting in his Pa's saddle, asked, "Wait... when did we get home?" Lucas chuckled.  
"About seven last night, you fell asleep in the saddle. Is your headache gone?" Lucas asked as he set two plates on the table.  
"Almost completely." Mark said, acting like he was looking out the window. He eyed his Pa, who was giving him an, 'oh, really?' look.  
"Ok, so maybe it not doing _that_ _much_ better, but it's fine." Mark said as they both sat down.  
"Maybe Doc Burrage can get the truth out of you... he's supposed to be back this morning."  
"Ok, so it's worse. Nothing a little fresh air won't take care of... maybe if we went for a ride?" Mark asked, hoping his Pa would agree. They hadn't been on a ride just for fun in a long time... and Mark enjoyed long rides with his Pa.  
"Tell you what, we'll take a ride to the dam on the edge of our property and _then_ head over to Doc's." Chuckling at, and grateful for the fact that Mark was unable to tell a lie to him without giving it away.  
"Really Pa?" Mark asked excitedly.  
"I have most of the chores done anyway, hurry and eat so we can get going." Lucas said as he smiled at the expression on Mark's face.

As they rode, Lucas began talking with his son, trying to figure Mark's fitful sleep.  
"Mark, has something been bothering you?"  
"No, why?" Mark asked, confused why his father would think there was something wrong.  
"Last night you had a pretty restless sleep. You kept thrashing around and calling out."  
"I don't remember dreaming about anything... sorry if I kept you up..."  
"It's fine, just as long you're sure nothing's the matter." Lucas said, watching Mark's face for any sign that he was missing something.  
"No, as a matter of fact the social yesterday kind of settled everything for me."  
"What do you mean?" Lucas asked, not quite sure he understood.  
"Well Pa, I've been talking through what happened with you and Micah, which has really helped, but I was still having a hard time accepting everything... especially when people wouldn't stop asking questions. But yesterday there where no questions, no worried expressions, or pity faces. Finally it wasn't 'paralyzed Mark McCain' or 'kidnapped Mark McCain'. It was _just_ 'Mark'." Lucas smiled as his son explained.  
"Mischievous Mark who wouldn't stay out of the food!" Lucas joked. "Mark, I want you to understand that what you call 'pity faces' are just people who are concerned for you, but don't know how to help." Mark thought about what his father said for a moment, before nodding in reply. He supposed his father was right, but it sure was annoying getting stared at. But people had stopped for the most part, and it was time to move on.  
"Race you to the dam, Pa!" Mark hollered as he raced forward. Lucas chuckled and took off after his boy. Lucas was half way up the hill that led to the river and saw his son reach the top, but Mark suddenly stopped instead of proceeding down to the bank. Lucas continued up the hill and called up to his son.  
"Decided to give your old man a chance to catch up?" Lucas joked, but wiped the smile off his face as he stopped Razor next to Blue Boy.  
"Mark?" Lucas asked, not sure what was happening. Mark didn't reply, he just looked down towards the river, not even acknowledging Lucas' presence. Lucas looked in Mark's eyes and saw that they where distant and shallow. Lucas reached out to put his hand on Mark's shoulder, but as he did, Mark suddenly turned Blue Boy around and raced away.  
"MARK!" Lucas called after his son, and urged Razor to follow Mark. Blue Boy was a much younger and faster horse than Razor, and easily escaped Lucas' view. Lucas followed the trail the horse had left, and was surprised when he found it led back to the house.  
"Mark!" Lucas called as he entered the yard. He saw Blue Boy standing by, but not tied to the hitching post in front of the house. Lucas searched their home, then made his way to the barn, calling Mark's name. Lucas let out a sigh of relief as climbed up the ladder to the hay loft and saw Mark sitting in a corner, knees drawn to his chest, head down, and arms wrapped around his legs. Lucas got closer to his son, he could see Mark was shaking fiercely. As Lucas sat next to Mark and put his arms around his child, Mark started to yell.  
"NO! LEAVE ME ALONE!" Mark screamed. At first Lucas was shocked at the tone Mark had used with him, but as Mark continued to yell, Lucas realized Mark wasn't screaming at him.  
"STOP! PLEASE, STOP!" Mark bawled. Lucas took his son in his arms and restrained Mark from crawling away, Mark almost had fallen from the loft at his first attempt to leave.  
"Mark, you're alright. It's alright you're safe." Lucas whispered in his fighting son's ear. "Mark, you're with Pa, in the barn. Mark, I've got you, I'm not going to let anything happen to you." Lucas continued.  
Lucas turned Mark around and took his son's chin in his hand and made Mark look straight at him.  
"Mark, look at me." Lucas said at normal volume. Mark continued to scream hysterically.  
"MARK!" Lucas yelled as he shook his son.  
Mark stopped striking out, and Lucas saw his son's eyes soften. Mark locked onto his Pa's eyes, and as he realized he was safe, collapsed into his Pa's arms.  
"Shhh, it's alright Mark. It's alright." Lucas said as he ran his fingers through Mark's hair.  
After quite some time, Mark looked up to his father.  
"Oh, Pa... It... it was horrible..." Mark cried. Lucas took his son's face in his hands and began to wipe away his son's tears. Lucas had wanted to know what had happened that day for two months, but at that moment he was too busy concerned for his son's emotional state to worry about getting facts. He pulled Mark back into an embrace and continued to comfort his son.  
"It's over Mark, those men are dead, you're safe."  
"But Pa, she's not! She didn't... she..." Mark tried to explain, but couldn't.  
"She who, Mark?" Lucas calmly asked.  
"The lady, she was down at the river, I saw her!" Mark's began to breathe faster, and Lucas could feel his son's pounding heart beat.  
"Mark, calm down and slow down. Breathe nice and easy, in and out." After Mark had relaxed Lucas continued. "Mark, start from the beginning, start with school, and take your time."  
Mark inhaled deeply and tried to organize his thoughts before speaking.  
"You sent me off to school that morning and I was having a really hard time with trying to remember Ma after you had talked about her that morning. I was getting frustrated, but decided to just let it go and get school over with. Then Ms. Adams assigned us that report on our parents and it brought everything from that morning back. I rode home and you and I talked, and I thought I could finish thinking through everything if I did some riding. I knew Micah was coming for supper, so I was just going to ride to the dam and back. But as I came over the hill... I saw three men and a lady. At first I thought they where all traveling together or something, but then I saw they- they where... they where beating her up, Pa." Mark started quietly crying again as he saw the images in his mind. "I wanted to do something, I was going to go get help or something, but then I saw one of them take his bare hands... and he... Pa, he strangled her." Mark body was wracked with sobs, and Lucas' mind was running in circles.  
He almost couldn't believe that his gentle, young, tender child had seen something so horrific, and had to watch it play over in his mind. Seeing something like that would give a grown man nightmares, let alone a ten year old boy.  
"I couldn't move. I just sat on Blue Boy... It was like my body wouldn't listen to me. Even after they spotted me, it took me a minute to react. I was too slow and the caught up with me. One of them took Blue Boy's reigns and led me somewhere while the other two rode back down to the river. I was too scared to say anything, and then before I knew what was happening, he was trying to kill me..." Mark shivered and pushed himself against his Pa, almost as if to make sure he was really there. Rage boiled inside Lucas, but at the same time, love for his son took over. He knew he was going to need to be there for Mark and reminded himself that the men who did this where dead, and couldn't touch his boy.  
"Mark, I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you from seeing that, and I know these next few weeks are going to be hard, but you don't need to be afraid anymore. Those men are dead and they can't hurt you or anyone else." Father and son sat in their barn for several hours, talking through what Mark was feeling. Lucas and Mark went into the house eventually and started an early supper. Lucas had decided that Mark didn't need to see the doctor and the two of them spent an evening together, reading the Bible.

As Lucas had told Mark, nightmares did come, but his Pa was there to help him through them. Mark dreaded the day he had to tell Micah what happened, but Lucas was there the entire time, helping Mark through the memories.  
Mark woke early one morning and turned so he could see his Pa, who was still asleep. He watched Lucas' stomach rise and fall and contentedly waited for his Pa to wake. The last three months had been extremely difficult, there had been times Mark wasn't sure he could go on, but his Pa was always there to help him. His Pa had helped him learn to accept what had happened, and taught him how to live with the memories that kept coming back. As Mark lied there, he realized that he had gained two good things during his experience. One was the memory of his Mother that had returned, and the second was the bond with his father he knew had increased as they sat embracing each other in that cave. 


End file.
